3 hours.So much to talk about, so much to say,so much to share,so little time.I want to tell you something but I have to limit the conversation.it was unappropriated to say such things to someone who belong to others.I try to heal every wound with your smile, wounds of of my bleeding heart.I thought it will heal soon enough,yeah it was healing actually,but my mere imagination.I’m happy to see you,at the same time I felt sad.Happy cause you were there, sad cause even though you’re there but you are not with me.Ironic,Irony….
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHA, This is what you want to hear is it? :-D :-D :-D This is what you want to see?Yeah I am very good at this,I’m really2 good.Cause I know, nobody CARES as long they are happy.Cruel world?unfair world?Yeah I know it, I didn’t blame it, I blame myself.”A” told me, don’t fake it, cause I will end up hurting myself even more.Then what?Should i show you the miserable part of my life?nah~I’m not trying to gain sympathy..what for.. I just try to express my feeling… If you hate it, please leave this page at once.I didn’t force you to be here, not to mention to read it.
Am I becoming a self centered person… I try to, but I don’t think I can.I told you, when at some point, I felt like I’m messing with other people’s life, leaving is a better option,yeah, I don’t want to be a fool for you.You hate it when I call,it was meaningless,those meaningless night conversation,those meaningless text messages…Told you, those two birds can’t never fly together,told you those are the world I can’t touch, told you I’m happy for the rainbow even thought it was for a moment.
But when you fall, you don’t care if the bird comes from different kind, when you fall, who cares about the difference between worlds?And I must have been banging myself to the wall for letting the rainbow go.But maybe, it was just me.Maybe you love me because I’m fragile.Maybe because I can’t think correctly at the moment.Maybe you just playing with my feeling,maybe it’s a game that and I fall for it.Maybe, just maybe you’re enjoying every single moment of it.
Maybe I was just a toy for you after all….