Sometimes it’s great when an ex wants to be friends but mostly it is not. Maybe you want nothing to do with your ex anymore because it’s over or maybe you want to be much more than friends with your ex.Whatever your feelings are, you need to know why your ex wants to be friends before you agree to be friends. As you will see, their reason may not be as innocent as you might think.
If you still care for your ex you could be setting yourself up to get used and hurt. If you don’t, you could be setting yourself up for a whole lot of trouble by giving your ex false hopes or allowing them into your life, as “your friend.”So, to help you make up your mind about whether or not it is a good idea to be friends with your ex here are possible reasons why they think it is.
To make sure you identify the real reason, be very honest about your ex – what type of person they are. Is it really possible your ex still cares for you, are they possibly vengeful and spiteful, or is your ex stringing you along?
One of the more harmless reasons why an ex wants to be friends is they think it is a kinder, gentler way to end your relationship. They have had a hard time deciding to break up and an even harder time doing it. They feel guilty about hurting you and want to do what they can to make you feel good about yourself. In practice, being downgraded from lover to friend – “You’re a great person and I’d like to stay friends” can be more of an insult than a comfort. Another possibility is that your ex wants to be friends because it makes life easier. You still mix with the same people, hang out at the same places, and so on. They don’t want you to cramp their style by getting get jealous, angry or creating a scene. In other words, by asking you to be friends your ex is basically asking you to guarantee you’ll “act nice.” That way they won’t have to hide out and miss out on the action.
It’s possible your ex wants to be friends because they still love you. If it has been a while since you broke up you may be thinking quite the opposite – that wanting to be friends is a sign they have finally accepted the break up. Don’t be fooled. It’s more likely a sign they want you back. Remember, it can take time for a hurt and angry ex who still loves you to realize they need some kind of contact – such as being friends – to have a chance of winning you back.If your ex ended the relationship, they may want to be friends to keep their options open. They want to try life without you but keep you “on ice” as a back up option if it doesn’t work out. One of the biggest dangers is that they don’t necessarily intend to get back together. They may only be interested in stringing you along for sex. Either way, this brand of “friendship” will usually include a healthy dose of flirtation designed to keep you interested and available.
As you can see, when an ex wants to be friends there are good reasons to think very carefully about whether or not it is a good idea. This is why, when an ex wants to be friends, you need to wonder why this is not enough – what they are hoping to gain.
22 Responses
eheheh i agree,amsyar is suitable jadi ustaz
uih ustaz amsyar in the house muahahaha…
wah,care gak tu….
tp tula…
ble kapel bg mcm2…
ble pts, wat cm xknl…
tros pts hubngn slturahim tu…
kan stu dose…
nape na tros pts hbngn, dlu time bcnte org tu la yg mengangkat die ke tmpt lbh tnggi…
dri brk ke cntik,dri lapar ke knyang,dri kuncup ke kembang…
ble pts, tnggl cmtu je…
gle kejam…
klau mcm tu la pengertian cinta pd akhrnye, aku rela x bcnte…
time cnte wat dose,ble dh pts plak tmbh lg dose…
menganiaya, kejam, zalim, sme ade…
ats seseorg tu la nk maafkan atau tdk, mati nati jwb la dlm kbr ye…
renung2kan dan selamat bercinte~
hahaha aku prefer x 5 lagi best ade air cond…jom naik jom
hooooooooooooooooo……
ak xsempat na bce smpai hbs…
sbb na kua dh ni…
ex tu ape radin???
ex 5 ke?
yg honda tu??
slalu budak2 rempit angkt2 tyr tu ehh??
ke bkn?
sorry,my mistaken..haha
well, i like your rules btw..LOL
friends with exes?
1) they don’t get over it yet
2) they were desperate
3) they were out of options
4) they don’t moved on
5) they were totally desperate
6) lupa dah step nak mengorat
7) you should taught them the steps
hahahahaha.. i don’t be friend with my exes, its against my rule :)
cheers mate!
not at all, just curious LOL
Im from Kuantan ..hey peter are u interested in me?ahahaa
a heartbreaker and gedik..=p
where are you from btw?
well, i want to break up with him.Tapi not entirely his fault.i did some mistakes too.Mind you the worst case i brought up , i try nak uji die, send my housemate punye gambar dekat him..then he respond well, i nak marah pulak..well im a bad girl too.Used to hunt those rich boy in my hometown.U could call me gedik la jugak hahaha
why did you break up at the first place?if you still want to be friend just continue on with the relationship
i agree with you Peter..kudos mate
im single now…but i think i could put some sense kalau ade bf nanti
heh, should you really do that lil princess? is your bf ok with it?
yup yup yup..i agree, i still kawan ngan my ex.
takde problem pun kalau nak kawan kan?better have friends than enemy
disaster is coming
some people couldnt just ley iy go…hell, maybe he or she wat the ex to become how do you say it, become an open option
i Dont know…for me..its better to forget everything that could hurt us
Be friends?what could be achieved by doing that?get over it already
It seems like those ex cant forget the past, could nt they?